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Blog Created: 6/12/04
Number of entries: 112
Number of comments: 194

Visited Blogdrive Members:
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General Information

Main blog:Dead Eyes
Birthday:January 6th 1989
Occupation:Artistic / Creative
Education:High school
Religion:Not religious
Service Attendance:Never
Race/lineage:White / Caucasian
Location:South Africa, Cape Town

Contact Information



Body Size:Slender
Height:5' 6" (168 cm)
Eyes:Hazel Green
Vision:No assisted eyewear
Hair Color:Dark Brown
Hair Style:Wavy - Medium
Facial Hair:None
Skin Tone:Light
Best Feature:Eyes
Clothing Pref.:Gothic
Tattoo Info:ah crap. i wish i had a tattoo. it would be really cool. I do have a semi one tho. i have a burn on my back that looks like a trible thingey. Surprisingly tattoo-ish O_o
Piercing Info:Nope. none. id like my eyebrow pierced tho...er...perhaps. no...maybe not...
More Details:MORE?? omw. im weird, strange, look funny, dress funny, act funny, eat funny, i live in my own world, and have no affection for the outside world. oh. and i have too much silver stuff.

Personal Information

Relationship Status:Single - Involved
Family Info:I have two older brothers, 20 and 23, one at home and one out of home. My parents are ok with each other. Im the youngest, and the least talented. Im the quiet crazy one.
Sexual Preference:Really Straight
Astrological Sign:Capricorn (Dec 22 - Jan 19)
Existing as:Vampyre
Smoking:No Way
Your Home:Live with parents
Biography/About:Ive never been the popular one. i make friends semi easily,but they should rather be termed acquaintances.None of them are "friends."Im the weird crazy one.Living in her head for more than is healthy.
Likes:Music,MUSIC,drawing,MUSIC,writing, reptiles,gareth,hugging etc gareth :P, RPG,COMPUTER GAMES.OMOMOM, PLANESCAPE TORMENT PWNS!!...O_o *ahem* *calms down* anything techie.crazy stuffs.Guitars.chinese food. free stuff.existentialism.Philosophy
Dislikes:Show offs, preps, wedding food, people who dont give u free stuff. People who like me (except some ;P) music below a certain volume (loud makes everything better) playing base
Interests:reading, writing, drawing, gareth, sitting in the dark and thinking, being alone, being alone outside at night in the dark, being myself no matter what

Personal Favorites

People/Heroes:hm. i dont have many favorite people or heroes, Dryden Mitchel, for what hes been through and still achieved and mostly cz he rocks
Books:Only forward by Micheal Marshall Smith, the outsider by Albert Camus, Being and Nothingness by Jean Paul Sartre, Tithe by Holly black
Authors:Micheal Marshall Smith, Albert Camus, Jean Paul Sartre, Steven erikson, R.A Salvatore
Music Genres:Alternative, Rock, Emo, Metal, Black Metal,
Bands/Artists:Deftones, Slipknot, Dashboard Confessional, Spill Canvas, Rage Against the Machine, Nirvana, Alien Ant Farm, Placebo, Gorillaz, Finger 11, Dead Poetic, Taproot, MCR, Snow Patrol, Jason Sweet, AFI, Dresden Dolls,
Albums/CDs:Greyest of Blue Skies, Dead Poetic, Gift
Songs:You, Dare you to move, Broken Words, Thousand Mile Wish, Asleep, Bliss Tearing Eyes, Aim Snap Fall, Poem, cemetary drive
TV Shows:INVADER ZIM!!!, jackass, south park, Fooly Cooly
Movies:Donny Darko, Grave of the Fireflies, Kung Pow, King Rat, Try, Waking Life
Actors:Jack Black, Seth Green, Jake Gyllenhaal
Games:PLANESCAPE TORMENT, Theif, Drakan, Doom3, Ultima VIII, most RPG's, FINAL FANTASY 7&8!!
Sports:huh? wha- O_o
Colors:Dark Red, black, dark blue, lime green, burnt orange
Pets/Animals:Ferrets, Iguanas, Siamese fighter fish, dogs, cats, tigers
Cars/Motorcyles:Suzuki motorbike, citroen, peugot @_@
Food:Salads, french fries, anything with cheese :p banana and peanut butter O_o
Drink:Ice Tea, Sprite, H20, guava juice, COFFEH
Quotes:I dont think im positive. Everyone else is just negative.
Position:position? uh...i do sit funny O_o in a way that everyone thinks should be painfull.

Four Most Recent Entries

I dont know anymore
Relationships... Friendships...People. The definition of fucking awful. I dont know how I pick the people around me... I always seem to end up in the fucked up situation. A shitty life, I can deal with. I can take it. But these feelings, these situations, with other living breathing people. If you had told me things would be this way a few years ago, Id probably tell you youre an idiot and laugh in your face. Stupid, stupid old Rene... You were so much better... No, no you werent. You were just simpler... Screwed up, too many problems, over emotional, but so much simpler. The days when I...
huh. surprising
I never realised how good some friends can make you <deleted> feel. I know they can put you through shit, and sometimes they take alot of maintenance. But I dont think you realise how good it is to have them around, untill you dont see them forever. Then you speak to them, and you wonder what kind of idiot you were to ever think you didnt need them. Everyone has their place in this big puzzle. big... big puzzle. Called my screwy life. Everyone comes together with their little inputs into one big friend machine that spouts fuzzy happiness and glowing exteriors, most times, if not all....
ugh. I wish I knew what was wrong with me. I just feel so screwed up. I have no reason to feel this way at all... I keep on trying to blame people around me, but theres nothing wrong with them. Its just all me. I keep on trying to say "just wait things out till that happens, then itll be ok." But how would that help, when its me Im not ok with? I just wish I could change things. Everything would be so different. I feel like I cant even be my normal self, because I cant feel enough to give to other people. I just want to be alone somewhere.... and I dont know why...
I wrote an entry. It got deleted... Basically it said: I feel lost. I dont know what Im doing. Why am i fucking around with iTunes on a saturday night? Its not like it would be hard to find something better to do. "oh, here is a lemon. Let me cut it in half and pour its juice into my eye. Im already having more fun!" It also said something about the cosmos giving me a map with a star on one side, "You Are Here" and a question mark on the opposite side, "Where you Should be" and in the middle they chucked a whole field of cluster fucks, mountains, valleys, pits of venemous leprachauns and the...

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